This past weekend, I was in NY for an alumni retreat for the Creativity and Personal Mastery course. Through a number of informal discussions, one thing became clear to me: a personal ”goal” can be very different from the person’s “intention.” In fact, I believe that a person’s goals can often at times contradict his/her original intention, without even realizing so.

We as achievers and over-achievers have a tendency to set goals for ourselves, big or small, near or future. A goal is something that we’d like to reach, to accomplish and say “yes! I’ve achieved my goal of fill in the blank.” However over time, goals become checkboxes; just one more thing to check off. “Why do I need to? I forgot.”

We get so caught up in our goals that we forget WHAT and WHY it is that we want to get out of this experience. Goals help us focus, but too much focus on the “destination” hinders our growth and creativity in the journey. It prevents us from having fun along the way, our willingness to stop, ask for help or change our itinerary altogether. We must pause once in a while and ask ourselves: “who is leading whom? my goal, or me?!”

Goals = Ego-booster.

We are unwilling to let go of our goals when there are clearly signs telling us to switch gears. Perhaps it’s pure stubbornness, or perhaps we’ve failed to notice because we are so driven by the need to check off the preconceived checkbox.

I’m more of a fan of intentions. An intention embodies the direction and significance of the “what” and “why”. Setting your intention is like setting your direction. There may be many goals catalyzed from your intention, but it’s the intention that keeps you grounded and honest with yourself. Having your intention in sight will help you to have an easier time dropping a “goal” when it no longer makes sense. For me, intention serves as my North Star.

So loosen up. If you’re currently having a hard time getting something you want, then ask yourself, what is it about it that makes you want it so much? And, are there other things that you could do to get the same things that you’re looking for?